I remember reading an article–probably in some teenage magazine my older sister subscribed to that I thought was THE BOMB at the time, about the types of friendships you’ll have and should keep throughout life.
It was most definitely one of these. They were BIBLES to young teenage girls in the 80s & 90s.
The Adventurous Friend, the Friend You Call In the Middle of the Night, the Friend Who Will Run 20 Miles With You, the Honest Friend, the Adult Friend, the Friend With Impeccable Taste in Restaurants, the College Friend, the Friend With Whom You Drink.
Ok, maybe not exactly those names–but I remember specifically a category called the “History Friend“.
At the time, all of my friendships were confined to the one school I had attended for the whole of my academic tenure. Save for a few stragglers who came along in junior high, we had all known each other since we were about 5 years old. All my friends were History Friends.
They’d all seen the perms, the glasses, the high-waisted jeans “french rolled” (of course), the waterfall bangs…and we were still friends.
Then I moved. And went to college. And then to New York. And got married. And, suddenly, I’m in my thirties.
And now I get it.
History Friends are the ones whose houses you can just show up to and not worry that you’re imposing. History Friends are the ones who know all your secrets but wouldn’t (TO THIS DAY!) dare tell your significant other or your siblings or your parents. History Friends still know when something is off. History Friends never need the back story to whatever is going on–they were there.
When I’m around my/our History Friends, I take my shoes off and curl up on a couch. Sometimes I fall asleep. Or they do. There’s something about being around people you don’t worry about impressing or entertaining that is peaceful, rejuvenating.
I actually fell dead asleep in the middle of a conversation surrounded by my family after my bridal shower. No one minded. They probably expected it.
For me, History Friends don’t care if we hang out during tub time or happy hour. We make time when we have it and pick up right where we left off. And they don’t call me “crazy” for running marathons. They understand because they get me.
The don’t hold this outfit (or face) against me. In fact, my girlfriends probably each had one, too.
One of my most favorite things about these friends is that they become OUR friends almost instantly. My History Friends love JB and his love me and that is the end of it. No drama, no try-outs.
And when we go to weddings and birthdays and funerals with/for these friends, as you inevitably do when you’ve known people for the whole of your life, it’s more like being with family than just friends.
(Image courtesy of Bill Watterson and available from Andrews McMeel Publishing)
And that certainly makes it way Better Than the Alternative.
Do you have History Friends? You know, the ones who saw you before all the plastic surgery (I kid, I kid…but definitely before contact lenses). How long have you been friends? Or are your friends all the Friends Whom You’ve Known Post-Awkward Years? I can count on my fingers how many we have between JB & I. Give ’em a shout out! Or better yet, give ’em a call!
Now go out and run!