Tag Archives: family

Better Than the Alternative Tuesdays: Naysayers

15 January 2013

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Better Than the Alternative Tuesdays: A day when we share why it’s better to be here, not matter what kinda crap we got going on, than to not be here. A day to reflect on the fact that life is awesome and I, for one, am glad to to be here.

Naysayer: nay·say·er (\ˈnā-ˌsā-ər, -ˌser\) one who denies, refuses, opposes, or is skeptical or cynical about something.

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Five or six years ago I was with extended family, sharing my new goal of going back to school to become a physical therapist. I had a long road ahead of me, pre-reqs and GREs and hoops to jump through and all, but I was excited to finally find what I wanted to be when I grow up!

And this one Naysayer just kept shooting me down.

“It’s a really competitive field.”

“Those classes are really hard to get through as an adult.”

“So-and-so didn’t get into this-other-medical-school, you probably won’t get into NYU.”

All from the same person. The same Naysayer. It got me so down about my choice. In fact, this was what I’d been telling myself for years. It’s too hard. You’re not smart enough. There’s no way they’d want you. Finally I’d got the guts to say it out loud and here was a Naysayer trying to put me down before I even go going.

photo-9JB, the Obi-wans, and my closest friends didn’t let me give up on my dream. And here I am. At NYU. Kicking butts. Taking names.

There was another Naysayer who (still) cannot believe I’m not working as a personal trainer for the money and, instead, putting money into my education. I can’t. I just CAN’T even begin to tell you how frustrating THAT conversation is for me.

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Naysayers can get you down. They get me down sometimes, too. But they can also be fuel for your Fire of Awesomeness. Naysayers are often people who are not living the life they want to live. (These Naysayers certainly weren’t/aren’t) and they just loooooove dragging others down to their unhappy level.

You know what, thank you, Naysayers. You have given me the opportunity (more than once!) to say, “TOLD YOU I COULD DO IT!!!”

If that’s not a reason it’s better to be here than not, I don’t know what is. Happy BTAT, friends. Haters gonna hate, you keep on rocking.

Now go out and run!

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2012 Retrospect

31 December 2012

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Confession: I don’t really want to look back on this year. I mean, I DO because it’s over and I’m happy about that but I DON’T because whenever I think about it, I cry.

And not pretty cry. I ugly cry about it.

It seems like a far-off nightmare that I have only just recently woken from to realize that I have my life back and can do the things I like/want to do instead of planning my day around bathrooms and getting shot up with poison.

I much prefer to be out running that doing most any other thing. (Image courtesy of MK Photography)

I much prefer to be out running that doing most any other thing. (Image courtesy of MK Photography)

Instead, I prefer to say I learned a lot of stuff in 2012.

  • I learned that my husband is THE BEST.
  • I learned that sickness can bring people together & make relationships stronger.
  • I learned who my friends are, cliché but true.
  • I learned that father-daughter bonding happens over the strangest conversations.
  • I learned where every single bathroom in Central Park is located & which I prefer.
  • I learned that videos of my niece make me smile even while drugged up post-op.
  • I learned that I am smarter than I give myself credit for.
  • I learned that a mother’s instinct extends well beyond childhood.
  • I learned that flowers & cards make me happy when I’m blue.
  • I learned that I am only limited by myself.
  • I learned that scars don’t matter so much as the story behind them.
  • I learned that Twitter & Facebook can be places of great support.
  • I learned that there is life both in & after sickness.
  • I learned that my brothers & sisters are seriously awesome.
  • I learned that I love running more than I thought I did.

I learned that change is a part of life but it’s what I do with the opportunities I’m given that will define me.

Catch you on the road in 2013!

Catch you on the road in 2013! (Image courtesy of MK Photography)

I’m ready for 2013 and all the adventures it holds, including: no fewer than 2 new babies, 4 weddings (& counting…), my first clinical rotation, several half-marathons, a 200 mile relay, and maybe another 26.2 to round out my total to 10.

I’m ready.

Looking ahead, never behind. When I look back for too long, I tend to trip & fall. (Image courtesy of MK Photography)

Looking ahead, never behind. When I look back for too long, I tend to trip & fall. (Image courtesy of MK Photography)

What did YOU learn in 2012? What are your goals for 2013? 

Happy New Year!

Now go out and run.

Marathon Widow/Widower

4 December 2012

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It is no secret that marathon training takes A LOT of time.

Early morning runs, weekend long runs, nights at the gym, stretching at work. It’s just soooooo time consuming.

Very, very early marathon morning (MCM '05)

Oh yes. Get used to this hour of the morning

It’s tough to marathon train when JB isn’t also training. We hardly see each other during the week and I’m gone for hours and hours on Saturday and then sore for the rest of the weekend and all I want to do is sleep.

I’m super-fun during training.

Tons of fun.

Tons of fun.

It’s like he’s a Widower. Well, he’s sort of a perma-Widower for the next three years because of school, but that’s neither here nor there.

Point is, it’s lonely to be married to a marathon runner. And it’s absolutely fair to get a little annoyed at said marathoner.

There are things I do to make sure JB doesn’t feel completely annoyed with me for the three months I am running 40+ miles a week and spending my Saturday afternoons in ice baths instead of at brunch with him.

  1. Make sure he knows my schedule. Like, a weekly hard copy of my workouts schedule. If he knows what days I’m available, we avoid a lot of miscommunication.
  2. Schedule in down-time with him. He likes afternoon/evening quality time so I make sure to get my weekend workouts done in the morning.
  3. Make sure to do things he likes. I’m setting aside time for me to do things I like to do, so I make sure I’m planning things I know HE likes to do. Give-Take.
  4. Ask him to meet me at the end of my run. He likes to run with a buddy (me!) and at the end of my runs I’m fine with just shuffling along the river for the last few miles.
  5. At the end of the season, I make sure to thank him for his support and talk with him before I decide to start up another fun athletic event.

Communication = happy home.

And they lived happily ever after.

And they lived happily ever after.

Now go out and run!

My Thanks

21 November 2012

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Disclaimer: This post is sappy and not at all about running. You’ve been warned.

Gratitude is something I have plenty of this year. And I don’t know how to put into words just how grateful I am for every single gift and opportunity I have been given.

And there is no way to express my thanks to my friends and family.

They held me together.

Me. In pieces.

They always say that you know who your true friends are in times of crisis. It’s true. My friends visited me, brought flowers, sent cards. They fed me…well, mostly JB, which is a feat in and of itself.

But mostly, my friends comforted me. When I couldn’t go out, they came to me. They never complained about having to accommodate me at every turn, never made me feel guilty for being out of commission and a big, whiny baby for the past two and a half years.

Friends take you running, colostomy bag and all.

My dearest friends, thank you.

Flying with friends.

My friends weren’t the only ones who hung by me, gross surgeries, colostomy bags and all. I have the best brothers and sisters out there. And, lucky me, I have A LOT of them.

I sincerely hope this picture is old enough and shadow-y enough to protect the identity of my siblings. Would anyone guess that’s me front and center, picking up my sunglasses? You guys look awesome, by the way.

Mr. & Mrs. Jones, Reno & Blondie, Red & the Irishman, The Golden Child & Ginger, Chi-Chi, and sweetest Peanut…I seriously have the BEST family in the world. Also, they have excellent taste in flowers and were always the first ones to arrive at the hospital room post-op.

What’d I tell you? Gorgeous.

When I was literally in pieces, they called from cities near and far to make sure I was ok. To make sure JB was ok. They asked about every step, were/are shoulders for me to lean on. Some are very broad shoulders to lean on.

Angel baby.

Thank you. All of you.

I can’t really describe how amazing my parents are. Those of you who know them know why I use the word “amazing” without hesitation. At every turn, they were there. Every time I felt overwhelmed, they helped shoulder my burden.

They supported me from beginning to end, wiped my tears, and reminded me that it would be ok. I would never have made it through the darkness had it not been for them.

Mom & Dad got our backs, always.

For my gorgeous husband, there are no words. With every squeeze of my hand, every protective arm around my shoulder, every night I had control of the remote, every disgusting bodily function endured, every gentle kiss he said, “I love you”. I will always do my best to show him my gratitude for enduring this year with me, alongside me, often leading me in a direction I was too scared to go alone.

I love this man.

My love, my heart.

Happy Thanksgiving, all. I’m eternally grateful for the support of my extended family and all of you.

Now go out and run!

Don’t Sweat It

13 November 2012

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Stowe is pretty.

Oh, hey there, Mt. Mansfield. You’re big.

And the air is clean and the sky is blue and there are stars at night. It’s a nice place to visit, FYI my fellow New Yorkers.

But it is COLD.

Don’t let that 34 degrees fool you, it was at least 20!

Weddings ALWAYS throw off my eating, running, life plan, especially when I’m part of the hosting family. Which I have been for four weddings now. And counting…

It’s tough to stay on track when you’re out of town, let alone attending approximately three parties in three days. I am not the girl who freaks out about this. Call me crazy.

We hit up the gym when it was convenient and decided that between chasing our niece around, cleaning up around the house, dancing the night away, and walking in heels (me, not JB) for two days, exercise was had throughout the day.

Big day past the 5-mile mark in Vermont!

So, yeah. I worked out. I also ate my weight in brownies and meatballs. There are no calories in food when it’s on a wedding weekend, so I assume I lost weight on this trip, right?

Baby lifts & squats are hard work. Except when they’re with this little Peanut.

One weekend out of 52 in a year (or 40-something) is not going to make or break my training or my fitness. I don’t know why people go bananas about missing one workout or a two days to a family vacation. It happens.

I guess I’ve experienced being out a whole lot longer with some…other problems. Perspective.

Walking = victory.

So relax. Have fun. Don’t get crazy about that one run you missed so you could sleep in and be beautiful for the wedding. I mean, “it’s better to look good than to feel good” (famous Obi-wan quote). I see my family once a year, if that. Family > running.

And if running > family time then do it and don’t feel bad.

Make your choices and live with it. Don’t complain to everyone in the world that you can’t do EVERYTHING. I mean, you’re a grown-up. Be a grown-up.

I’m SO grown up.

Next time you have to choose, choose the one that’s most important TO YOU and then get over missing the other.

Now go out and run!